Apparently, when you get to a superior position or a position of authority in work, you lose that part of your brain that recognizes that things take time to be done correctly. I was just given an ass-load of comments on a presentation I prepared for a partner, and was working on integrating his illegible and often unhelpful comments when he called:

Him: “How’s the presentation going?”
Me: “Good. I should be done in 30-45 minutes.”
Him: “Doesn’t work for me. I need something in 15 minutes.”
Me: “Um, ok, but I’m still working through the draft, and then I have to enter this into our database and the program takes a while to get the changes and – “
Him: “I need something in 15 minutes.”
Me: [sigh] “I’ll try.”
Him: “Tha-” [trying to get out "Thanks", but hanging up on me half-way through].

Twelve minutes later, the phone rings:
Him: “I need to see something.”
Me: “Um, ok, I’ll print what I have and bring it around.”

In his office, he reviews the changes that I’ve only partially input:
Him: [exasperated, frustrated] “This needs a lot of work.”
Me: “Well, I’m not finished with it yet.”
Him: “Why did you bring me something that’s not finished?”
Me: “Because you said you needed it.”
Him: “I do need it, and I still don’t have it. Finish it, and bring it back in 15 minutes.”

So that’s where are now. I’m expecting a call, oh, in about twenty seconds, but I’ve spent the last 15 minutes on the phone, and writing this (I don’t deal well with pressure I guess).

Sometimes I wonder why I work at all, instead of quitting, and starting my own dog-walking business. Oh wait, I’m terrified of dogs. That’s right.

Yesterday, I had some technical difficulties with the site and couldn’t post in the afternoon, and some of you emailed and said you couldn’t access it. For this I am sorry, but there’s really no use in complaining to the people who run the site, because this shit is free. Also, I’m not good at complaining, because while doing so the slightest thing will set me off, and that usually means some sort of racist remark follows, irregardless of the person’s race.

Me: “Yeah, there’s a problem with my blog.”
Them: “Well, it’s a free site, sir, we don’t have customer service.”
Me: [inordinately angry, yelling, and sweating] “Hey, don’t get mad at me because you’re Jewish!”
Them: “I’m not Jewish sir, I’m Christian.”
Me: “Yeah, whatever – dick.”

Also, on a lighter note, “happy birthday” wishes to Dana (4/29), Mark (4/30), Nevin (5/2), Julie and Marji (5/5 – not twins), Jeni (5/6), Bill (5/7), and Joe and Lara (5/9 – not twins either).

I am such a good friend.