First time?

Alright, I’m gonna make this real simple-like, because I know you’re not so bright, mostly because you drink too much. Some things you need to know:

• To find out some background info, click on the “About Me” tab, which, ironically enough, will tell you everything you never wanted to know in the first place about me and this site. If you’re not very good with words and would rather look at pictures, check out my life in pictures.

• The “Choice Cuts” tab is sort of a greatest hits, except there’s nothing great about them. More will be added as we go through this magical journey of love, betrayal, homoeroticism, flour, and nudity together.

• If you want to email me, you can do so at jason@jasonmulgrew.com or via the “Contact Me” link at the bottom of each page. I may not email you back, but it’s not because I don’t like you �" it’s because I’m planning to steal your car and I think we should have minimal contact prior to my theft. Because otherwise it might get weird.

• If you like the site (which means you are completely tasteless and sexually insecure), please pass it on. Send it via email to your “friends”, post it in your Dungeons & Dragons message boards, or use the “Spread the Word” link. Just get out the word, because if I don’t get famous soon I’m just gonna flip the fuck out.

• If you ever have trouble with this site (say for example, it gets blocked by your employer because it has too many curse words) you can view the no-frills mirror site here. Don’t worry about remembering the address; you can almost always find it if you google “Jason Mulgrew”. Which is my name.

• The site is updated whenever I feel like, usually three days a week. If you plan on coming back with some frequency, then I suggest you bookmark the index page. This way you won’t have to view the intro each time you visit the site. There is also an RSS feed, which you can find here.

• I love you. I’m not ashamed to say it, and neither should you be.